Unhelpful? Funny Responses to "What Are You Doing?" What does it look like I'm doing? I like to respond with Doing nothing. Makes sense. It generally meant that they had read somewhere on some really stupid website that you should try to get the girl you want to talk about herself, because girls like to talk about themselves. Theres always some kind of obligation, because theyre my parents and I love them and I want to honor what theyve done for me in giving me a great life. Weekend gone! I can tell you out of personal experience that the constant repetition of this makes you feel a lot like you will never be fully accepted as part of the society/community you live in. 2. "See, I will finally make you smile.". Also Go ahead and get your friends to hate me and think Im mean, if its ever helpful to you. Funny How To Respond To WYD (What Are You Doing) Texts Yep yep yep. Or, if I tell a potential date some generic things (oh, probably reading and writing a lot) and add that Id like to take a break so they know Im open, Im engaging in the same coy behavior thats bothering me in the first place. DP: As you know, [ note, I do not know ] I need someone to [ renew my library book | paint my bathroom | walk my parakeet | clean my cat litter ] and I hoped you might help. So if someone said What are you doing next Thursday? I imagine they said Would you like to do something on Thursday? Are you asking where are you from of every person you meet the first time, or only of those whose appearance/accent makes you suspect they are not from your locality? Whereas it might feel more awkward/imposing for her, and less for me, to just ask outright, Do you want to go to [event] on [this day]?. On the other hand, that was a while ago. Well see you at other time, but not in the morning.. No, seriously, TheDukeDevlin has the correct answer. If they want to invite me to something Im interested in and available for, I can say yes, and if its something I cant do, I can say I have other plans, etc without it sounding weird. So when I get a what are you doing after work Friday? text halfway through work on Thursday just tell me what youre going to suggest in the same message. It sounds like he'd get into some fun and adventurous dates. I say nothing much and the other person responds, yeah, its nice to be lazy sometimes, right? And I dont want to get into how no, its not lazy to need time to recuperate and our society puts too much pressure on needing to be constantly productive and not respect ourselves as people. I mean, where are you REALLY from, but whats up is harder, since nothing/dont know tends to elicit a why not? or you should be/do more fun! And I dont know what to say to that, because no just seems rude and I didnt invite them to improve my life. He doesnt need to be that nosy about how you spend your time. Im in my late 50s and, frankly, my plans for the weekend are likely to be boring to this younger inquirer. Ill do it anyway, but saying it that way doesnt make it somehow not an order, Mom! (this one may not be my wheelhouse anyway, no translation needed. Like if I can magically guess the exact time theyre free and what they want to do with literally no input from them I guess I win hanging out with someone who wasnt that enthusiastic with the suggestion that we make plans? Why is that worth it? No matter how old you are, you don't want to be badgered about your life choices. Funny, But True Weekend Quotes That Will Make You LOL So Hard Michael Wiley on Twitter: "RT @h_miller76: Had you asked me what I'd be Jana: It's ok. I'll catch you later. Ive got some stuff to do around the house, etc. I dont find it weird, I think its just whiteness and the safest thing to do is presume white people are going to be like this to some extent, until they prove otherwise. You wonder where he'll take you. Then they can ask for details to make up their minds, or just shut you down with a no of preferred firmness if the event doesnt appeal. Like, OK, were not people who talk to each other about our lives beyond the weather and traffic, cool. I guess I run with a very specific social crowd and it hasnt occurred to me in a while that its not always doable to say Im going to do CRAFTS ALONE, its going to be awesome. But I used to be in a grad program where people were super competitive, and if I said oh my god Im going to stay in this weekend, Im so peopled-out people would be lowkey mean about how I wasnt networking/studying/running charity marathons enough. 300 Weekend Captions for Instagram to Salute All Working - getchip You're going to want to keep your messages quite a bit shorter on apps like Tinder and Bumble .) Sorry, Im busy. Then one day I said to her you know, when you ask me my plans without saying what youre thinking of, it makes me really nervous because it feels like signing a blank cheque, and she said oh no, that wasnt my intention at all, I didnt want to make you feel bad by suggesting things if youre already busy and now if she wants to suggest a thing, she tells me straight off what the thing is. When I issue a soft invitation I am often not sure if the person wants to hang out at all, and getting a Yes, get in touch and let me know when youd like to do something would encourage me to go on and do the planning whereas Yeah, we really should I would be more likely to read as I dont really want to do anything. "Thank you, I appreciate that.". Then I can pin them down on what, and when, without having pre-committed myself to some favor they were hinting at sideways. Why? its differential equations, 2. While having to put up with gday, mate lacks the structural oppression of whats aimed at POC, it is still annoying. This week is bad for me, but next week Im free except Tuesday. If anyone else runs into this, Im not free on Saturday, so Ill see you some other time! is a perfectly polite and respectful response. Why? a s h l e y. I can see how doing anything on thee weekend is small talk, but that would only count if the person is someone you are not on visiting terms with, like most of my colleagues. And she might feel hurt that Id rather do nothing than do something with her. Ive learned a lot of strategies.). N- New adventure. I have strong memories of my MIL telling my husband, shortly after wed married, I need you to clean out the gutters. Or maybe you need to come this weekend and clean out the gutters. I really minded that! 150+ Funny and Witty Answers to the Question "How Are You?" Best Episode | Law & Order: SVU - Best Episode - Facebook LW specifically gave examples of when it happens and why it annoys them, yet dozens of people are trying to splain that this is just small talk in their part of the world. Texting or sending an email to someone. She asked me if we were doing anything on a certain day and I was like I cant think of what it is right now but we are definitely doing something that day. She then mentioned a big thing that was on in town this week and yes, that was in fact the thing that we were going to, so I was like Yes! I was taught that if you are actually inviting people for something, its rude to do it by asking them what theyre doing that night first, because it traps them without a believable excuse for saying no. There is no need to think about what they're up to or why they sent you the . and get back to work.) Texting gives you some time to think of clever or funny responses. Which I guess was appropriately scary for the season? If you use the same phrasing with suddenly a dramatically different meaning, its not other peoples fault if they dont know youve changed the meaning on them. Just wow. I also dont hesitate to tell people, Id have to check my calendar, what about you? in response to this kind of question! (Remember the FIRST part of what I saidthat Ive been careful to respect her autonomy since she was a teen. For me, it was lack of basic adult civility and respect that was the death knell I didnt expect safety or that level of support after 18 and didnt feel wronged that it was not given. I Hope You. Ill let you know closer to the day if thats okay. If it requires more notice, I tell them to count me out. Example: What are you doing? Do you have time to talk?" "What Are You Up To?" Can Be a Way to Ask "Are You Busy?" Here's another example: Jana: Hi Rob, how are you? My white mom has a very unusual first name (I dont know of anyone with a name that is even similar, AND its spelled with a non-English character) and, 40 years after she moved to the US people still ask her where shes from. I agree with you based on what shes told me, it feels very othering, and she resents it. Number 6 is my answer to " why don t u want to have kids ? Its not really surprising when you think about the mechanics of it its basically stereotype threat / stereotype threat removed. Its the best. I think thats why it can sometimes be difficult to answer? That sounds weird coming from you. Its funny I dont even register the question How are you? (Ive lived equal times on the West and East coasts of the US), but I see a couple of UK commenters upthread and when I lived there I never, ever got used to You alright? which, functionally, isnt that different. On the other hand, there are the problem/dominance-related ones: 1. Its hard to navigate things as just small talk when follow-up questions and comments quickly lead to territory I dont want to discuss. If you have people in your life who you trust not to get offended at this exchange, definitely give this method a try. I usually just say Im doing laundry. Making conversions . Be here at 6.. (Full disclosure: Whole in-law family are control freaks and this type of thing IS a setup with them. Its okay that sometimes Im in physical pain and need time to recuperate. Bonus points if you say something that makes zero sense, but you end up getting your family to look at you like a genius anyway. Mentioning your actual plans is one. This particular response though, is one of my favorite comments ever. I think w/ friends, if youre open to the getting together, you can say, Were you thinking of trying to get together? in a hopeful tone. So when you talk about watching her leisure time and knowing how she spends it all, I hear a situation that would be psychologically unhealthy for a teenager, let alone someone in their mid-twenties. Unless someone asked me, "What are you doing this weekend?". Im thinking the letter we had a while back with mandatory no premade food potlucks is a glaring example of a culture that needs changed, but I would also like to see room in the workplace for people who are good at their work but are reserved/private/not interested in relationships with their coworkers outside of work. For example, if there were a certain number of hours per week or month that she needs to work at certain things you set, Im not seeing a problem. A short, simple reply can be all it takes for you to let them know you appreciate their comment. friend: yep cool And I try to be easier on myself for not having more exciting weekend plans. (Rememberif she had specific other plans, thats a reasonable excuse. I always respond to casual/formulaic how are you questions with something positive, specific, and widely approachable. MY plans!) 3. How to Reply to Online Dating Messages the Right Way Ok. ( This simple expression embodies the fact that you don't give a f*ck!) 3. If they want to tell you about their job, they can. Riding an elephant. You know, I just had a *very* amusing misunderstanding with a facebook friend who was ranting about MLM (which I thought was the wlw type of MLM). As for rentpart of my problem with that is: I would never, ever rent a room to a non-family member. 30 Best Replies To "What's Up?" (Funny & Friendly) She looks so comfortable. Yak shaving is a programming term, although Ive also seen it in other contexts. Follow. I'm sorry I can't really talk right now. They are asking whether you want to go on a date with them on Thursday. It sort of came to a head last week when I was on the toilet, and the kid came to the door, and my kid answered the door, and the conversation was like And then when you part somebody accidentally says love you, too. Thats how it always happens for me, anyway. LW is a better person than I; I would be tempted to say, I desperately need to re-grout the bathroom and weed the garden. Im with this LWask me to do a specific thing or dont. I also like the advice to just tell people I interact with regularly that I dont like that question. When I am planning an event I usually offer a description of what I have planned first and then we move to scheduling but most of that is done in social media or by e-mail these days. No other teller (in this bank, or others that Ive been in) does this. The other day I got into this conversation with a mum I have to say mum colleague rather than mum friend, because her kid is in the same class as my kids and we seem to hang out quite a lot but shes an extreme extrovert and I am really not, and I see more of her than I would really choose to if I had to seek her out. So, I have learned its a lot easier if I answer I might be working that weekend (which has the benefit of being true, I do work most weekends) and then find out what she wants to do and decide if I want to go. I also feel compelled to give easy ways out when I feel like Im making a request, including ending requests with and no is a perfectly acceptable answer.. I mean, what else are you supposed to do with life? Reluctant runners just need a nudge. I live in a face culture, so saving the face of the invitee who wants to turn your invitation down is very important. Why does it need taking care of?? I understand theyre looking for an ice breaker, but its not that interesting to talk about Ill probably get to laundry if Im not too lazy. I wish there was another common conversation starter among people you already know. I might hang out with some friends on Sunday. A playful Why, whats up? is cool, but I am probably not compatible friends with someone whose response to a polite-small-talk/soft-invite-opening is to demand why I am asking such a nosy question. Try to be kind and positive in your response. Funny Bumble Answers #4: Ironic, Nerdy-Cute Guy What are you doing for dinner? And sometimes its due to the other person not grasping the soft no/non-answer to drop the conversation (generally people I am not already friends with, like the one bank teller who keeps on asking* and that I do find nosy/irritating). I dont want to give you a rundown of my plans. For all that the Your X is Valid thing is trending nowadays, you still need to be able to have basic conversations with people, which includes stuff like this. 200 Best Sarcastic Quotes and Funny Sarcasm Sayings - Parade Just standing here waiting for stupid questions I guess. Its not even really pushback. I would think that any event for which one needs to book a venue and/or hire a caterer would also be the sort of event to which one sends some sort of formal invitation, which is not really the case for the situations the LW describes. Indoor Cat raised some good points. You don't want to end up like your crazy aunt who keeps asking you the same question during every holiday dinner. (And it also stopped me from being super-duper free to do alllll the weekend shifts. Thankfully, the discomfort is mostly on my end at this point. I was usually planning board game evenings and role playing games and I only tried to ask people whom I knew to be interested in what I was planning. have a Canadian accent that some USians pick up, and I dont mind if people ask if Im Canadian). Me: Fine, thanks. 1. If you have a new question, start a new topic. Its just a formulaic greeting. Later the grad students said the table turned to remarking on the professor as soon as she was out of earshot, including their surprise that she could be a professor of engineering. For that matter, even confident people can fall into the What are you doing Thursday? trap when theyre trying to sound unassertive. If youre female and you answer, and then he decides your time sounds like it should be at his disposal and asks for a date, and you dont want to go, now youre stuck in that ugly probabilistic space where various sorts of threats, anger, and violence may be coming at you. Sam sends Julia a text at 9 PM on Saturday night, with an idea that could give the company an edge in customer service's call hold times. To read all future answers to your comment, please bookmark this page. Of course both people will vary from the scripts with personal style and the situation, but that is the general way it can go. They may just be an indirect communicator, and Hey, want to go have dinner might feel too abrupt without any conversational preamble. "Hi" or "Hello". Overwhelming majority of the time, someone who says why do you ask? wants to know why do you ask. Or why do I feel entitled to her presence and her company? (that said, I do aim at treating her the way I would an adult roommate.) !" I kind of resent that you assume I will tell you. If someone asks me the question, I am happy, because that means they are probably inviting me somewhere. "Great, thanks for asking" is a generic response that you can use when you receive a "how's your day going" message. Its okay to say you are within your rights to do these things anyway, because you are. If they mean well then they will try to stop when you explain that you prefer to be asked directly. Eating. And then they get all pissy because the girl is taken aback by being asked out so abruptly by this guy about whom she knows pretty much nothing except his appearance. What to Say: "Thank you, I had a great weekend.". I honestly dont even know why people say it at all when Ive never seen a follow-up to it. Alternatively were just going to have to start getting out of bed earlier so we dont run into them, but I suspect that if she realised we were doing that she might actually change her own schedule. Yeah, I get that it is a soft invitation, but it also feels that the hard invitation has been tossed into my lap. But people should take turns is different from someone else should always go first (or for gendered/other status reasons, I should always go first). Im an introvert that needs enough time in my week for quieter things around my own home without people. That it can be based on something as intangible as a mood. Indeed. One morning when we were together he asked, So what are your plans for tonight? I said, Oh I dont know. If the reason for you that you daughter should help you at X time with X thing is because family, is the reverse also true? I do have a preference for having the What are you up to Friday? question asked first though because I appreciate that they want to respect my schedulewhenever I book hangs with my good friends, we let each other know what blocks of time are going to be rough to fit each other into and know not to ping them too much during those times. She could NOT grasp that she was experiencing a cultural difference and the question wasnt going to stop because a) people were genuinely curious and/or wanted to show they were interested in her as a person and b) she was living in a part of the country where small talk was expected and people would consider it rude NOT to ask that question. Also I have learned to give hard noes. I get the where are you from? question all the time. In my case this is always 100% true because unless I literally have my calendar open in front of me I do not know what I am doing at literally any time on any day. Every weekend! I might be up for casual after work hangs but not going clubbing in that sketchy bar across town. What are you up to on Saturday? has often been my go-to when dealing with someone (like my sister) that I *know* will feel pressured to accept whatever Im suggesting whether or not she wants to or has the time/energy for it. I really wish I had some better scripts to deal with this stuff how do I limit our contact with her to a level where the kids and I are still happy to see her, without pissing her off? The week after is all good. ), (4) I just found a salamander, can I put it in your mouth?. For a cashier: Great, how are you? just because they are probably required to ask as part of their job. I really thought that an invitation was going to come later. k. Yes, I think theres a fairly clear difference between people who ask as small talk (for example, when youre both waiting for the microwave in the staffroom, or waiting at the bus stop after work) and when its done how LW specifies. It feels invasive what I do on my weekends is my business. ME to GROUP CHAT: [Friend] and I are planning karaoke on [date] If you are available and interested, please let me know by [date] and Ill reserve a room! We all walk the kids to school together and she started calling in at our house every. BUT! (This one is so trite that it takes a few moments for the humor to sink in.) It's nice that they want to know about your plans, but their curiosity can feel more like an interrogation. This is how I deal with it: People of just about any accent can turn up just about anywhere and be from there. Its very jarring to see that thrown around when its a nasty slur here in the UK. What is your favourite clip?